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USA ViolaLover
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 14, 2012 12:32 pm   Post subject: Thank you SST Reply with quote


Hi friends and listeners, I just wanted to take this time to offer my deepest and most sincere thanks to you all. SST has always been a bright point in my life, and a lot of that has to do with the community that's been built here. In a world where it's commonplace for chatters and bloggers to attack others because of the cloak of anonymity, it's such a breath of fresh air to find a place so full of compassion, people who genuinely care about each other, and go out of their way to help other listeners.

A lot of people don't know this (I have worked hard on not letting it show), but for years I have struggled with depression. I've gotten very good at hiding it and internalizing my emotions, but recently it's gotten a lot harder to do. I don't know what's changed, or maybe I've finally realized it's not healthy to bottle everything. Either way, throughout everything, SST has been a steady constant in my life, and is probably responsibly for me not falling any deeper than I have.

It's weird for me to talk about this, I am not good at talking about myself or putting into words the way I feel, but people have told me writing it down will be helpful. I want to apologize in advance if I seem short or distant in chat, I'm not sure how all this will effect me, if it will continue to seep out or if I'll be able to get it back in the box (admittedly, probably not the best idea). But, I just wanted to say thank you to all you SSTers for the love and support of the community, and for your patience as I work things out. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

~Hilary (ViolaLover)
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USA Bruiser VIP (subscribed member)
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 14, 2012 12:36 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote


*GIANT HUGS*

We love you. We are here for you. Anytime, anywhere, some of us not just in chat.
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You see, madness, as you know, is like gravity. All it takes is a little push!
Germany Victor VIP (subscribed member)
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 14, 2012 12:40 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote


Hey Hilary,

i feel really honored to read your words cause i know that someone has to feel really comfy to give such things away from himself/herself.
SST is indeed a place where people care in a good way. you get support and people don't use knowledge about you in a negative way, but to help you.
USA Jim_A VIP (subscribed member)
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 14, 2012 12:43 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote


Find things that make you smile and only smile and ignore everything else.
Netherlands Seleene
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 14, 2012 12:58 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote


Viola... I am going to do something weird now. But I hope it will help you. I will try to keep it short.

Five years ago I got ill, in the middle of the hard year of my chemistry studies. The resulting bad results demotivated me, and my illness got worse too. I can extend on the whole proces more if you like, but for now I will keep it short.

After a few years (about 2 years ago) it got so far that a friend had to call 112 (911). The police rammed through my door and were just in time to save me from the overdose of painkillers that I took.

Obviously I had help after that, people were suprised because for all those years they never noticed anything about me at all. I guess that feels familiar.

I know how depressions feel and how less and less interests you without you being able to do anything about it. At some point, a few months after I got help (which didnt help that much by the way) I got really mad at myself, and sad, and everything. It turned out to be a turning point, I have no idea how, but for some reason my body was tired of it and the survival spirit came back to life.

Looking back, being a student I have acces to the science databases of published articles and I started digging for information. It turns out that most people at some point will reach this point where the body says that this cant go on any longer.

Hilary, no matter how bad the situation looks, as long as you are in this phase of the depression you just have to do 1 thing: go on. And somehow you will get out. I know how this feels, and I know how pointless the help of people in this is, because it is something you have to figure out for yourself.

But it does end. It always does..

And I am sure that until then, and after, people at SST are here for you. You make this a more wonderful place for us too.

The little time we know eachother I already enjoy the chatting, so on a personal note I can say that you make my day better too.

If you feel like talking about it at any time, then I would welcome that.

What I like about SST is that I rarely see a fight here, if at all, also from the time once I joined SST for the first time. The community is really what makes SST such a great place to spend time.

~Bob (Seleene (Indeed, I am not a girl.. I keep having to explain to people that Seleen (in Dutch exactly as this) is a name for one of the chemical elements, and that my name does not refer to a girls name haha)).
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France masked_platypus VIP (subscribed member)
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 1:16 am   Post subject: Reply with quote


Indeed, viola, we're working hard to let this site a peaceful and perfect place for everyone.
I'm very glad to hear we're helping you in this diffcult situation. I've personnally gone through it ten years ago, so if you want to talk about it via PM, don't hesitate.
Meanwhile, enjoy the good music and the whole community.
*hugs*
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Canada ld80061
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 7:15 am   Post subject: Reply with quote


I'm glad that SST is helping you out, even in a small way!

Three cheers for great company and great music! Very Happy
Germany Sylat
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 7:19 am   Post subject: Reply with quote


Viola... I just feel very happy when reading your words. We all love you and we are proud to have you here. You are a great addition to the community.

Thanks for sharing this!

*BIG HUG* ♥
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 7:20 am   Post subject: Reply with quote


*BIG HUG*
USA maddy VIP (subscribed member)
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 7:27 am   Post subject: Reply with quote


Hi Viola!

Thanks for sharing that information. I know it could not have been easy. My mother suffered from clinical depression for many years so I know at least second hand what you are probably going through.

Here are two hug links to hopefully make you feel better. And please, feel free to come back and use them anytime you need to! Smile

http://tinyurl.com/bigbearhug

http://tinyurl.com/6lnlmw/

Always will be here for you...with hugs and love and compassion. If you ever need to talk, you know where to go! Wink You definitely have friends here.
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Last edited by maddy on Mon Oct 15, 2012 10:33 am; edited 1 time in total
USA Angela12 VIP (subscribed member)
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 7:58 am   Post subject: Re: You're Lovely Thank You Reply with quote


Hi Viola,

I just wanted to let you know how much I admire you for your courage to tell all of us about your depression. By telling us, you have made a huge step in your recovery. I too am available for pm or email anytime, if you need to chat or get something off your chest. I understand what you're going through, as I too have had episodes of depression through various times of my life beginning in my 30's after my first divorce, and graduating from college with a BBA in business/marketing. Well, I have a beautiful home and great friends and family - and SST! I too am going through a bad patch - my parents both passed away close together. Also, I'm going through a sort of a career crisis - where I want to do a job that utilizes my creativity.

Well, I just wanted to give you my support, love - and hugzzz.

Take care,
Angela
(Andrea)
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 9:53 am   Post subject: Reply with quote


Rain or shine, this street of mine is golden ....

Glad SST can provide you support when you need it most. It is fantastic there are places like this on the net.
USA rooner
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 10:44 am   Post subject: Reply with quote


Viola,

Thank you for sharing with us--I know that it can be so hard to do so. As with many others, I'm here for you if you need to talk, or dump, or process, or just get a hug. You are never alone!

I also do not feel like I'm good with words, but I hope you will bear with a personal reflection...My husband and one of my best friends both struggle with severe clinical depression, and have for most of their lives, so I understand a little of what you're going through. Though it took a long time for him to come to it, for my husband, realizing he needed and then finding (with a doctor) the right medication has helped TREMENDOUSLY with his ability to function and in making the deep lows less deep and the downward spirals less frequent. My friend had a lot of success with counseling and learning to recognize her downward spirals, along with techniques to manage them (cognitive behavior therapy) and has done so without medication. I hope that, in addition to the wonderful, supportive SST community, you have also sought professional help from a doctor, a therapist, or a clergyperson (who would probably refer you to one of the first two).

I get very frustrated with our culture, at least in the U.S., which stigmatizes and/or makes light of depression ("why don't they just pick themselves up & be happier?") and makes it very hard for those suffering with it to talk about it. I'm so glad you feel comfortable doing so with us!

Lots of hugs and love,
rooner/Debbie
Germany alien_avatar VIP (subscribed member)
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 1:55 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote


All I can say is... *BIG HUGS*. Smile

It's a good thing that you found one more thing to engage you in a positive manner.

Congratulations for the SST community are also in order. People here are generally kind and supportive, which (unfortunately) is something of a rarity in internet chat/forums.

Many people don't seem to believe that things like good behavior or kindness matter in the Great Anonymous Internet Void.
Tales like Viola's prove this wrong, and I think that little fact is worth remembering.

Everybody keep up the good work. Wink
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Germany aGandalf
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 15, 2012 4:05 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote


That is the power of true/positiv music and the love from people how like this musik.
Thank you Viola that you share your emotions with us.

*LOTS OF HUGS*

Ganda
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